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Your POEMS...

 
 

So you think you can make me laugh, do you?
That’s what the Chuckle-chomping Bellywobblers of Sillyhilarious said, who tried to force a smile upon my face by placing Tickle Toed Tiny Ants in my pink and purple pants. And the Comical Clownfaced Cannibals of Witty City who feasted only on the barbecued funny bones of their unfortunate victims.  And finally, the Armpit Prodding Pygmy Warriors of Laffennajoak Lagoon couldn’t make me squirm – you see, I have no armpits.
Perhaps you could do better with your funny poems…and if, on the off chance, they make me smile, I shall post them below

 
 

email us your poems Here...

 
   

Thank you to my new friend from Australia, Tahlia Westlake, for these two very different poems. And she is very right – tamarins are the cutest things. The only thing that I can think of that’s cuter is a pink kitten in fluffy bunny slippers asleep on a big huggy teddy bear wearing a yellow ribbon.

OLYMPIC DREAMS

Run like the wind, 
Swift and strong,
Believe in your dreams
And you will never go wrong.
Dive like a dolphin,
Swim like a fish,
Go for gold - it’s your only wish.

TAMARINS

Tamarins are the cutest things, 
even though they have no trunks and wings,
and their tiny ears can hardly compete
with the elephants’ ears that own a heartbeat.
But even with no big ears, trunks, and wings,
tamarins are the cutest things

                                                                                                                                                                  

And below are some of my favourite poems from my friends in the UK:

TICKLE
by Charlotte Howard
This makes me cry – I need poems to make me laugh. But it’s very clever to write poems that pull at your heart string.  I think mine has snapped. Poor Tickle! Come on Humphrey!

Now Tickle's gone too -
She left me behind,
Went straight on the bus -
She was so kind.
But, Tickle, you're here,
Right in my heart and my mind.
I cannot believe that you're gone -
You were always so healthy,
Since you were born
I loved you so much.
In one little touch,
Goodbye Tickle I miss you.
When I come on that trip
I want to bring tiny Humphrey too!

                                                                                                                                                                 

BIG, BLACK CAT
by Brooke Williams and Chantelle Chapman
Brilliant, descriptive prose. I particularly like the slug bit. And the swingy swing bit.

big, black cat, furry and black,
a nose as pink as strawberries,
paws are as sharp as razors,
tongue is as slimy as a slug,
tail is as swingy as a swing.
People hate this big, black cat,
‘cause he is EVIL as a pointy nosed witch -
whatever you do don't touch this big, black cat.

                                                                                                                                                                 

A GOOD ADVICE POEM
by Caitlin Waumsley
This is such good advice that I published it in my third book, Bits of Kids’ Brains

Be bright;
be a sight.
If it's hospital you fear,
do not be near
the crazy cars!

                                                                                                                                                                 

DON’T TRY TO BE FUNNY
by Beth Halifax
A wonderful, wonderful poem that flows brilliantly and has a fabulous punchline.

I tried to make him laugh
By jumping on the bed.

I tried to make him laugh
By jumping on the sofa instead.

I tried to make him laugh
By pulling funny faces.

I tried to make him laugh
By putting things in places.

I tried to make him laugh
By splashing in muddy puddles.

I tried to make him laugh
By giving lovely cuddles.

I tried to make him laugh
By talking while holding my nose.

I tried to make him laugh
By spraying him with the hose.

I tried to make him laugh
By putting on my face some money.

I tried to make him laugh
But he said, "Don't try to be funny."

                                                                                                                                                                 

ON A PIRATE SHIP!
By Katie Worden
Aaar-haaarrrr me maties! Yer be a fine yarn ‘bout life at sea. Shiver me timbers and pass me a parrot!

On a pirate ship
there’s a cabin boy,
and when he sees the land,
he shouts land ahoy!

Now nothing can prepare you
for the illnesses at sea,
like laziness and sea sickness,
and pimples on your knee.

There’s lots of jobs to be done -
do them or you won't get any rum!
Your socks may get mank,
but don't complain or you'll walk the PLANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!